Mutual Understanding
by a-frizzlefrazzle
Summary: James understood that even before he and Lily started dating that she and Remus had a bond that went beyond love in any kind of romantic sense.


Lily was the one who stayed up until Remus returned. She wanted to be there in case he needed and ear to listen or shoulder to cry on. His mother had passed away last night.

Sitting on the couch, the book in her lap now long forgotten, she stared out the window out at the street that was illuminated by the soul street lamp outside, casting an eerie yellow light on the street.

James offered to stay up with her, but eventually succumbed to sleep and was now snoring lightly on the couch that was the initial cause of Lily's surrender of her book. But she was getting worried now. The funeral was in the afternoon, there was to be an after-party that evening. She never attended a funeral before, muggle or magical, she was unsure of the customs, but it was getting into the wee hours of the morning and she was getting worried.

Just as her anxiety seemed to have reached its peak, a soft _pop _from outside signaled her friend's return. Lily ran to the front door, caution be damned, throwing it open to reveal a very somber and worn Remus Lupin.

"Hey," she said softly, both out of respect and wariness of her sleeping husband in the next room.

"Hullo," he said in a whisper of equal volume. He stepped across the threshold, slowly peeling off his jacket and hanging it on the hook by the door. He was wearing a black, ill-fitted muggle suit, the knot in the tie loose and hanging low on his neck now.

Lily pulled his wand out from the belt of her pants. Remus's mother was a muggle, he found it disrespectful to her muggle heritage to attend her wedding with any kind of magical instrument. "Here," she said, handing it to him.

"Thank you," he took it from her and stowed it in his jacket pocket.

"Do you want to talk?" she asked, her eyes full of sadness that caused Remus to flinch slightly. Lily knew that Remus hated being looked down upon, but his _mother _bloody died, if there was a day for sympathy, today was it.

Remus shook his head. Letting out a huff, she gave Remus a look that all who knew her well enough would know that she was not budging until she got her way. James being the regular receiver, Remus did not expect to get the look himself. He gave her a weak smile and then nodded.

They sat together in the kitchen in silence for a while, nursing the tea Lily prepared for them. "Were you close?" she asked, eventually sick of the silence.

Remus nodded as he sipped at his tea. "I tried being there for her more when my father died…but she kind of just shut off after that. I think it was a broken heart that killed her."

Lily could feel the prickle of tears welling up in her eyes. She reached out and took Remus's hand in hers, a gesture she was all too familiar with. Had James woken up and caught Lily holding hands with anyone other than Remus there would have been hexes flying in every direction. But James understood that even before he started dating Lily that she and Remus had a bond that went beyond love in any kind of romantic sense. They had a mutual understanding, a spiritual connection that did not require any kind of physical act beyond the touch of hands to be understood.

"Your mother was lucky to have a kind of love like that," said Lily.

Remus refused to look at her, but he squeezed Lily's hand a bit during their silence, as if willing Lily to understand his pain through the physical contact rather than through words. "And I was lucky to have them."

He looked up at Lily, smiling sadly as he noted the glassiness of her eyes. "I was so, so lucky. Most parents of lycanthropic children find methods of disposing of them. A lot of them run off to werewolf colonies where they think they'll have a better chance at acceptance."

Lily squeezed his hand tighter.

"But my father…he felt responsible for what happened. He looked out for me, wanted to make sure I had as normal a life as possible. My mother was a muggle, she didn't fully understand what the future held for me. She didn't understand the prejudices that exist in our world. I don't think she ever did. But it was her optimism that kept me from sinking into despair those years before I received my letter."

She understood. In her own family she had to deal with the degradations that went along with being "different." Not knowing what the future would be like for you in a world that didn't understand you. Those Hogwarts letters meant more to them than a simple chance at an education.

They finished their tea in silence, the only noise being James's snoring in the other room. Lily had the feeling that Remus hadn't cried at all. Maybe he simply didn't need to, silence being his own form of grieving. He was strong; he would not give in to fear and doubt and sorrow like others did. Remus didn't cry because he might have considered it to be ungrateful. To look at Remus's life and the turns it took, you would think that fate repeatedly worked against him, but he felt luckier than most. He had parents that loved him, friends that stuck by him even in his darkest of days; he was given a chance at a normal life and education. Yes, Remus was a lucky guy indeed.

"You can stay in the guest room tonight, I got it all set up for you."

"Thanks Lil."

* * *

><p>Remus had retired to the guest room when Lily finally decided to wake James from his slumber. He sat up, blinking wearily up at his wife who was smiling sadly down at him. "Moony come back yet?"<p>

She nodded, "he's sleeping in the guest room."

James pushed his glasses up onto his forehead, pressing the sleep from his eyes with the heel of his hand. "He alright?" he croaked.

"He will be."

"Don't expect him to start sobbing into his breakfast tomorrow Lil. He isn't like that."

She smiled. "No, I know he's not."


End file.
